Tuesday, October 11, 2011

My sister Susan

One of the few photos I could find of the 2 of us

Arriving home from out NY trip, she looks so happy!
 My sister passed away this last Sunday.  It is fair to say she had a tumultuous relationship with our entire family.  She had been troubled for a long time, and my prayer is she is now at peace, the peace she had been searching for her entire life.

With that being said, there was so much positive about my sister, and this is what I want to remember.  When I was growing up, especially in Denver, I had few friends my own age.  I was (am) fairly shy....and I think have difficulty with "small talk", which made (makes) it difficult for me to engage with people I do not know.  My sister never had this problem.  She could talk to anybody, young, old, male female, stranger, friend.....I wish I could have learned that talent from her.  While we were growing up, she always let me "hang" with her and her many friends.  I never felt she resented my presence, which was a real gift for me, since I always felt like a fish out of water anyway.  Her acceptance of me, and willingness to let her little sister be part of her circle of friends was a testament to her big heart.

We had a idyllic childhood, and I have so many stories that can bring tears of laughter to my eyes.  The time we "skipped" our Rainbow State Meeting to go see a Sonny and Cher parade in downtown Denver, then returned late, with candy, and spent the rest of the meeting unwrapping candy to eat, making a BIG noise and practically disrupting the whole meeting.  The looks we got from our Mother Adviser were NOT pretty....The times in our Rainbow meetings that we rolled coins to each other so we each could put something in the "pot" as they passed it around.....the time my dad took us to the airport to see the Beatles arrive, and he warned
At mother's 90th, the last time we were together.  Here she is with her beautiful girls
 her not to let go of my hand, and she didn't!  As we were running (there was a lot of running and screaming wherever the Beatles were), a poor girl, running and screaming the opposite direction got caught between us, and we made her run backwards for the longest time because my sister would not let go of my hand (it might have been one of the few times she did not
My mother with all her children, the last time we will all be together
 disobey my father, at least a little bit)

When we moved to California, I started to make some friends of my own, and we were not as close.  She was ALWAYS boy crazy, and CA is when she started to date in earnest.  I have to say, I can thank her that I made few very bad choices, because I had her example the steer me in the right direction (meaning I saw some of the bad choices she made, and decided that was not for me!)  We still had good friends together, the Sekiguchi sisters, that lived down the street, were all about the
I just love this photo, we were having such a good time!
same age as us, and we became very close that first summer especially, and even called ourselves the Seki-Days.  Good times.

Susan married young and had her first daughter, Shelly, while her husband was serving in Viet Nam, and she lived with us.  She had Shelly 2 months early, so we all got to share in the joy and fear of having a baby in the house that was soooo little!  Susan was a wonderful mother when her children were little.  She was a wonderful cook, and took good care of her family.  

I have to say also, that in a crisis, Susan was always someone you could depend on.  If something needed to get done, she could find a way to do it!  When she was needed, she really came through like a trooper!  When  Rebecca was taken to the hospital after she stopped breathing, Susan was able to track down the hospital and me in it to place a phone call of support and love (remember this was WAY before cell phones).  When mother first got sick a few years ago, Susan and Shelly just happened to be visiting, and Susan did things for my mother hygienically, that I would never have been able to do.  She was a real help during that time!  

I am comforted by the fact that Susan became a Christian my first year in college, both she and her husband, after he returned from Viet Nam.  They sincerely started a journey together, that unfortunately they did not complete.  I am of the firm belief that once saved, always saved, you do not lose your salvation.  So I am comforted that Susan has found the peace she always sought finally, and is the comforting arms of Jesus.  For all her frailties, all she ever wanted was to be loved and accepted, and to love in return.  She sometimes made this difficult, but I always did love her, always will love her.